Tuesday, July 25

Every one has a breaking point.
I don’t mean the conventional ‘stress’ breaking point. Something quite different, actually.
It is the one thing that is central to that person’s sense of self esteem. And it is quite easy to find, if you think about it.
I can find it fairly readily, in most people.
Everyone has one.
I do too.

I know yours. And yours. And yours. And yours sticks out a mile.

You, for instance, like to think you’re so cultured.
But I used to know you before you went to college and acquired that thin veneer of sophistication. Back when your idea of good literature was Robin Cook, and Erich Segal. Back when you couldn’t tell a Gauguin from a Goya.
I think you still can’t, unless it’s pointed out to you.

Or you. You like to think that you were loved once. That you were part of something timeless. Or so you were told.
But then, you have always been very gullible.

Or you. You think you’re so cool. You have long hair with those ridiculous streaks of color, you play in a band, and you’re a hit with the ladies. I’ve seen you practicing playing the guitar with your teeth.
Good for you. Enjoy it while you can. This is the summit of your life. Ten years from now, you’ll be teaching the piano to little girls.

And you. You’re smarter than everybody else. Intelligent.
Who told you that? Your high school teacher? Your friends? The adoring bimbo you have on your arm?
Please. You are the most contemptible of them all. They delude themselves, but you are desperate for every person to share in the general consensus of opinion about you. And you’re always afraid that someone is going to see through it, and expose you for the picayune you are.

So go away before I say something I will regret. All of you. You see, I’m not a nice person.

Tomorrow I’ll be the big man again. I’ll look past your stupidity, and tiptoe around your insecurities. And you can mistake my forbearance for acquiescence once again. That’ll make it better.

Leave me alone. I need some time to lick my wounds, and feel them harden into scabs, and burn into scars.
Go away.

4 comments:

Joychaser said...

some poultice for thy wounds?

Anonymous said...

Most assuredly.

writing is such catharsis.

Anonymous said...

that sounded like carol ann duffy poetry!!!!! except it was way better..cus I think she's a bit strange tbh...you're blog is very fascinating...keep it up! :)

Anonymous said...

wow... this post must come across really intense...!

But thank you so very much. Really. Thank you.